The perfect gift.

My 6 year old daughter has a knack for making first impressions. For her first day of kindergarten she told her teacher that "he was a good teacher and she had a great day but didn't know if she was coming back tomorrow, she would have to ask her mom." It was his first day of teaching and this little girl was putting him in his place in a matter of fact way. He told me he will always remember that moment, not so much the words, but how this little girl said it. So very sure of herself and happy. 

A couple days before first grade started, Quinn and her daddy, made a necklace together. It was  a snail shell they found together and put on a string. Honestly, it was quite ugly, and it smelled. So she decided the morning of school that it was the perfect gift for her new teacher. I tried to protest but my daughter, true to form, could not be persuaded to do otherwise. So she marched off to school with her "gift" and a sense of contentment that I can only wistfully dream of feeling. To her that necklace was special and it was obviously the perfect gift for any teacher of hers. I know it will make an impression. How could it not?

It's not the gift itself that she is giving her teacher, it's a little piece of her. Her wonder and curiosity that she feels everyone (even teachers) should have. To Quinn that snail shell is a part of nature that is beautiful and mysterious. Ugly and stinky though it may be, viewing nature to her is special and something to be shared. I don't think anyone at the receiving end of these gifts will ever be able to truly appreciate it the same way she does. Not the way I do watching her give these gifts. 

Perfect mommy soldiers.

I sit here contemplating how on earth I could possibly have thought I could be a mother. How do other women do this? I am ready to literally rip my hair out and scream. My three year old son will not give me a moments peace and my six year old has the attitude of a sixteen year old. So I think about the mothers I do know and wonder how could I have this so wrong? What is wrong with me? Why am I ready to just collapse and give up?

To listen to all of the other moms, life is so sweet and slow. They laugh everything off like it is just another tickle in there perfect lives. "Ha ha, she spilled red paint everywhere including the dog and then proceeded to run away and slam the door in my face, isn't that just adorable? I am so blessed!" They are never tired and never lose their temper. Perfect mommy robots. And I envy them. Oh how I wish I could just get through one day and feel that perfect and that blessed. Instead, I go to bed and lie awake and wonder how I can possibly do this. I tell myself tomorrow, I won't lose my patience. Tomorrow, I will be a great mom. Needless to say, I always let myself down. 

Do these women have some drug I don't know about that makes them mellow and yet full of energy? I want that drug! Give it to me!!! I want to be part of the drugged up mommy revolution!