I am having one of those years where I have finally fallen to my knees and yelled to the universe "What the Hell?!?!!" Am I not deserving of some sort of love? Does everything have to be a challenge on me? I wish I could say that I have lived as much as I have dreamed. I wish I could say that my life brings me joy and happiness and that being a mother is the best thing ever. I wish I could say my marriage was fine and I am happily in love. I wish I could say that I knew who I was and could stride forward in confidence without fear. I can't. I won't.
Does anybody? Does anybody really truly live without fear. Live ever flowing with the changes and still come out as the same person? If life is change then shouldn't change be second nature to us? Why does it also have to destroy as it builds? So I am stuck, asking more questions then willing to look for the answers. Because I know the answers. I'm just not ready to face them. Instead, I will probably just scream at the universe some more.
Girl, I feel your pain. You need to mark on your calender to read my post tomorrow. I just finished writing it. I'd love some feedback from you.
ReplyDeleteOK, I just posted it....hopefully I won't bitch out and delete it. oy vay.
ReplyDeleteDestruction is part of nature, the circle of life. Winter is the turning away, the dying, spring is new growth and hope. This is spring.
ReplyDelete